Darkness Always Wins
Written by Samantha Varela, October 2025
Embrace your shadow side
One of my favorite bands, Halestorm, has released a new song titled, Darkness Always Wins. The lyrics and melody immediately struck me and offered me a sense of hope and determination in a moment when I desperately needed it.
Darkness is often feared by many and in a literal sense, I’m not ashamed to admit that even at my age, I’m afraid of the dark. In the symbolic sense, I am also not ashamed to admit that I enjoy the darker side of life and appreciate all the beauty it has to offer. I also embrace my gothic label. However, the darkness that exists within each of us is a darkness that has no place for fear or shame because it is in this darkness that we can find hope and inspiration… if we know how to look for and embrace it.
The song reminded me of two psychological concepts that I find very fascinating, Carl Jung’s Shadow Self and the concept of the Exiles in Internal Family Systems developed by Richard Schwartz. Both theorists assert that we have a dark side within each of us that holds the parts of us that we hate, the parts that carry shame, negativity, and all the things we want to hide from the world. However, they both claim that when we befriend and get to know these darkened parts of ourselves, we can learn to love and embrace them, approach them with compassion and understanding, and transform them into positives that help drive our lives forward.
This belief, like the song, gives us a message of hope. It reminds us that we can continue to move forward even in our darkest times. It shows us how we can use our darkness to improve our lives, and it is that belief that allows me to agree with Ms. Lizzy Hale, Darkness Always Wins because it is the key to our own healing.
The amazing news is that you do not need a gothic therapist to learn how to embrace your dark side! Psychology majors are expected to learn about Carl Jung and his theory of the Shadow Self, and many therapists have a basic understanding of how to use Internal Family Systems to embrace your exiles and help you live a life that is well balanced between the light and dark! Your darkness doesn’t need to be feared or hidden because it’s just as beautiful and unique as you!
